Independence Day

When I was a sophomore in high school my first quarter grades were significantly lower than they had ever been before. I was aware of the "sophomore slump," but I wasn't willing to give in to it. I wrote a contract with myself, indicating that I would try my hardest in school and do all that was necessary to bring my grades back up. Then I asked my adviser and my English teacher to sign as well. My parents were not involved. Both of those teachers quizzically said, "Well, OK, if you really want me to sign, I will, but you don't have to do this."

THE Mossy Ridge

Sometime between 1997 and 1999, I wrote a "Declaration of Independence" for myself. I signed it and shared it with some other close friends and family members, including my pastor. I can't put my hands on it right now, and perhaps that's for the best. The point of it was to declare in writing my independence from my mother. She is a controlling influence in my life; even now that I'm 47, she's an influence and a source of consternation. I'm caught between wanting to be an honorable daughter and needing to take care of myself.


We are celebrating Independence Day with my dad, and she's invited but won't come. I felt guilty that we don't have plans with her this weekend, so I almost invited her over yesterday, but I was just so tired from moving our school last week that I couldn't bring myself to call. This is an opportunity for me to sit and wait for the right time to have her over. We actually spend more time with her than with any other parents, yet she's never satisfied. So, here I sit, with yet another holiday, and I'm declaring, independently, that I will enjoy this day, one moment at a time. I'm heading out for a hike in a minute. There's nothing like being alone in the woods to clear my head and calm my mood.

Blessings and Happy Independence Day!
Kathy